It's Always Been You
by Sassy Mionie's Pride
Summary: A story centering around Sirius and an OC character Kansas and their lives with Lily and James, deaths, love and every other crazy thing....SUMMARY SUCKS..badly....PLEASE READ AND REVIEW..Flames are more than welcome :]
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters.

Hey Guys!! This is a new story. It starts off real slow, but personally I think it gets a lot better. Please read and review.

It's Always Been You

Chapter 1: Introduction

October 31, 1983---22 year old Kansas Fanning was sitting on the couch in her tiny apartment sobbing her eyes out, she couldn't believe that her best friends were gone, all of them. She didn't get a chance to see what could have been with the absolute love of her life. All she could think of was the flashbacks….

What a week, was all that 11 year old Kansas could think. It was her first week in her new school, Hogwarts, and it had been a horrible, hectic week. She had instantly become best friends with a girl that was her age and had bright red hair, her name was Lily Evans. It was great, the two had clicked the minute that they had gotten on the train, and complemented each other perfectly, Lily with her bright red hair and emerald green eyes, and Kansas with her dark brown hair and electric blue/gray eyes, Lily with her fiery personality and sarcastic attitude, and Kansas with her calming presence and genuine kindness. Yup, they were opposites. It was great to have a friend like that instantly, there was only one problem, James Potter.

In the course of the one week, James and Lily had had 12 yelling and screaming matches. For some reason James was obsessed with her, and she hated him. Kansas had grown to hate these matches, because at the end of them, each would storm off to their dormitory and slam the door, leaving Kansas alone in the common room with Sirius Black, James's best friend. Sirius was nice enough, but it was always very awkward, considering they were in the aftermath of what had just happened.

As the years went on nothing changed between Lily and James, they still had just as many fights, and pulled Sirius and Kansas into the middle of it all of the time. Sirius and Kansas on the other hand had become fairly good friends, considering they spent half of the night out in the common room talking because neither of them wanted to deal with James or Lily. The only thing was that they had to pretend that they didn't get along in front of James and Lily, because both of them would die if they thought that their best friends were betraying them.

One day it all came to a head though, in the beginning of their 6th year after one of the worse fights James and Lily had ever had when they really pulled Kansas and Sirius into the middle asking each to pretty much berate each other. Kansas just ran away, she couldn't stand it anymore while Sirius stayed back a little bit longer to tell them;

"You two seem to think that the world revolves around you guys. Well news flash, it doesn't. Get what ever the hell your problems are worked out, then come find me and Kansas. Until then, I don't know either of you guys." After saying that, he stormed out and went down to the black lake, where he knew Kansas would have run to.

He understood her. He didn't really know all that much about her, cause when they did stay up talking, it was always about how stupid Lily and James were. It was what their lives seemed to revolve around, but Sirius was determined to change that. He really liked her, she was different from all of the other girls in school. She wasn't the kind of girl that he would flirt with like crazy, and she wasn't the kind of girl that he would make out with just for fun. She was real, not plastic, someone he could relate to. He could tell that she had her own personal demons, just like he did. And personally, he liked it.

A couple of days later James and Lily had eventually worked everything out and were officially "dating". Kansas and Sirius were able to be friends, and everyone was somewhat happy. Sirius had his schedule of girls that he had to make out with in one day, Kansas had her life, and Lily and James had each other. Everything was good for the 4 friends……

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	2. you suck at fighting

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters.

Thank you for the reviews!! Please keep them coming, they are my motivation to keep writing.

It's Always Been You

Chapter 2: You suck at Fighting

"What do you do when it all comes down on you?" Lily asked Kansas. "Everything is just going so wrong for me, I am fighting with James, my grades aren't as good as they should be, plus, I have prefect duties. How am I supposed to get through the rest of the school year?" Lily asked throwing her head into her hands. Looking at her with a rather unsympathetic expression, Kansas replied,

"Ohh yea Lils your so stressed. You have a wonderful boyfriend that you just create problems with, you are the teachers pet, you have all of the privileges of being a prefect. Think about it Lily. Your life is good, stop creating all of the drama."

Looking at her with a shocked expression, Lily stopped talking when she sensed how bad of a mood her friend was really in. The went back to quietly studying, when out of nowhere the school bully Lucius Malfoy walked out from behind a shelf stacked with books. Looking at Kansas he said, "Now what is a pretty little pureblood like you doing hanging out with a piece of trash mudblood like her. You should try hanging out with me sometime, I will really show you a good time." As he said this, he slowly started to wrap his arm around Kansas's waist and pull her towards him. As she started to realize what was happening, she reached up and smacked him with all of her might. After she connected with his face, she backed away and said,

"You scumbag. How dare you call my best friend a mudblood. I would rather he be muggle born, than be anything like you. And for you to think that I would be interested in you, how gross, oh and by the way, I'm not a pureblood either, I am muggle born just like Lily." As she said all of this she motioned for Lily to get up and they could leave, but before they could walk away, Lucius grabbed her by the back of her robes and threw her to the ground. As he gave her the nastiest look he had, he kicked her in the face as hard as he could and walked away.

When he was finally gone, Lily ran up to Kansas's side and helped her to her feet. Slowly they walked to the hospital wing, where Madam Pomfery was nice enough to fix Kansas's broken nose and jaw. When they were on the way back to the common room, Lily finally broke the silence, "Thank you." She whispered.

"For what?" Kansas replied.

"Standing up for me."

"Oh, it was no problem." Kansas replied after a few seconds.

The rest of the walk back to the common room was spent talking about how awful Lucius Malfoy was, and how much better all of the boys in Gryffindor were than all of the boys in Slytherin. When they finally got back to the common room it was 9:30 at night, James was still up waiting to say goodnight to Lily before heading to bed, and much to two girls surprise, Sirius was with him. Lily and Kansas thought for sure he would be in one of the various broom closets around school with some girl. When the girls sat down, Lily instantly began telling them the story about what happened in the library, and of course, she made it sound 10 times worse than it really was. When she was finally done, she and James bid goodnight and both headed up to bed, leaving Kansas and Sirius alone for the first time in forever.

Looking at her with a little smirk on his face Sirius said, "So, was the whole entire situation centered around Lily, or did she just make it all about herself?"

Giving him a knowing look, Kansas responded, "Actually it really had nothing to do with her. She just can't stand the fact that something could happen to me."

Laughing, Sirius responded, "Smack me, I want to see just how hard you hit him." As she started to shake her head no, he said "Just do it, I won't hold it against you, and I won't shut up until you do." Giving in, she reached up and smacked him as hard as she could and to her shock he started laughing.

"Please tell me that was not the hardest you can hit." He stammered between gasps of laugher.

"What that was hard."

"Oh no it wasn't, you hit like a girl."

"I do not."

"Do to."

"Fine, then teach me how to fight." Kansas concluded, waiting for Sirius's reaction.

"Sure thing. Starting now, I am going to "attack" you from behind, do something about it."

So when Sirius attacked her from behind and held her a few inches above the ground, she tried to kick and smack herself loose, but couldn't do it. Finally she gave up and Sirius put her down.

"Gosh, how the hell was I supposed to get out of that?" She questioned him.

"You'll see, he said in a sing song voice, I think that is enough for tonight we will do it again in a couple of days."

"Ok, I am going to go to bed then, good night."

"Night" Sirius finished giving her a hug.

As they both walked to their dormitories, they were pleasantly happy. Kansas was shocked by how easy it was for her to hang out with Sirius, he was like the perfect guy to hang out with. She really never thought of him as being so sweet and caring, she just thought of him as…Sirius. Little did Kansas know, that that happiness would not last more than a couple of hours…..

PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!!! If you guys would like you guys can IM me on aim at: SassJaz9….or on MSN at thepride9.


	3. sorrow

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters.

Thank you for the reviews!! Please keep them coming, they are my motivation to keep writing. I am sorry it took so long to update, I have a lot of homework, and recently a horse rolled over on me and broke my collar bone, so it has been hard to update

If anyone is looking for a really good story, a really good one is Undercover Lives by dark-light side. They are under my favorite authors. It is really good, you just have to read through the first chapter.

It's Always Been You

Chapter 3: Sorrow

The next morning, Kansas woke up happier than she had in quite a while. She couldn't believe how much fun she had with Sirius last night. He was really sweet, even if he said she hit like a girl. Well he was probably right, she thought. She had never been one of those super muscular girls that could just wham someone and hurt them, no, she had always been to nice for that, she resorted to reasoning. The idea of learning how to fight interested her though, especially with him as her teacher. She should learn some self defense with out a wand, incase her wand was ever broken in a battle. She quickly got dressed and walked down to the common room, she smiled when she saw Sirius down there too, getting ready to head out to breakfast. When he saw her coming, he stopped and waited for her to catch up, "Hey!" She said

"Hey girly." He said waiting for her reaction.

"Girly? Is that my new nickname?" she questioned him

"Either that or sweetie, take your pick."

"Ughhhh, they are both bad. How about something else?"

"Nope. Girly or sweetie."

"Sirius…"

"Choose."

"Fine, sweetie. Anything is better than girly."

"Okay then, sweetie."

"Great. Are Lily and James already down there?"

"I think so I didn't see James, or hear Lily."

"I didn't see Lily either." As Kansas said this, she and Sirius had just arrived at the great hall, and instantly saw the other 2 at the gryfindor table. When they reached Lily and James, Lily handed Kansas a letter. "This was addressed to you. I opened it, and I am sorry." Lily said as she walked away.

Looking at Sirius Kansas said "She opened my letter…..who gave her the right to do that?"

"I know, she shouldn't have done it, but maybe you should read it, why would she say sorry?" Sirius said logically, sighing, Kansas looked at the envelope and instantly recognized her old muggle friends handwriting. Kansas thought this was a little odd, because her old friend avoided writing to her, because she was terrified of the owls. Slipping the letter out of the envelope, Kansas began to read it silently;

_Dear Kansas,_

_Hi, it is Leslie, your old friend from the neighborhood. I am sorry that I have to tell you this, and I am especially sorry that it has to be by letter, but late last night, in the middle of the night actually, both of your parents were murdered. Nobody has any idea who did it, but I saw a bunch of funny dressed people (they were wearing socks on their hands, and their pants went up to their shoulders, literally.) and I remembered you saying that most wizards don't know how to dress in mongle (is that the word?) clothes_ _so I decided to eaves drop on their conversation, and I heard them saying it was the Avada Kedavra curse, and He-who-must-not-be-named was behind it. I hope that this information means something to you, and I am truly sorry. My parents said that they would take care of the funeral arrangements, so that it wasn't too much of a burden on you._

_--Love, Leslie_

Rereading the letter over again silently, Kansas couldn't believe that this was happening. Her parents were muggles, why would he want them dead? Her parents, dead, they were the only family that she had. Where would she go? Her parents were everything to her, they supported her through thick and thin, took care of her, they were amazing. How could they just be dead?

Seeing her face, Sirius asked "Sweetie, is everything okay." Looking up at him, Kansas choked out a soft "No." before she ran back upstairs to her dormitory. She sat there the rest of the day, just crying. When classes were over, Lily came up and said "Are you okay?"

"No, not really." Kansas replied, surprised that Lily would even ask.

"Well you will be fine. Which dress should I wear out tonight?"

"I don't know Lily." Instead of answering her, Kansas pretended to be asleep, and she eventually did fall asleep. Around midnight though, she woke up. She was still as upset, but this time she had another problem, she was starving. She hadn't eaten breakfast, lunch, or dinner. She quietly slipped out of the dormitory and headed to the common room. Deciding that she would take the risk of getting caught out after curfew to get food she headed for the portrait hole until she heard someone call her name.

"Sirius, what are you still doing down here?"

"Nothing really." He said, "Where were you going?"

"To go get some food. I am starving. I haven't eaten all day."

"How are you holding up?"

"Oh, you know?"

"I think Lily told everyone." He said with a wry grin

"Oh, well I have been better, that's for sure."

"Hey, I'll go to the kitchen with you."

"Okay, thanks."

"No problem." They walked in silence on the way to the kitchens, and they walked in silence on the way back from the kitchens. It was not one of those uncomfortable silences like she often shared with Lily, it was a friendly silence. When they got back to the common room they both sat on the couch and ate the food they had gotten. After she was done eating, Kansas just stared into the fire, thinking about how much she would miss her parents. She didn't even realize that tears were silently running down her face. Seeing this, Sirius pulled her into a big hug and let her cry until she fell asleep. Then he carried her up to his dorm, considering that he couldn't walk up to the girls' dormitory, and let her sleep with him.

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	4. Saturday

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters.

Thank you for the reviews!! Please keep them coming, they are my motivation to keep writing. I am sorry it took so long to update my collar bone is still not healed, grrrrrrr, and it is hard to get in a position comfortable enough to type.

If anyone is looking for a really good story, a really good one is Undercover Lives by dark-light side. They are under my favorite authors. It is really good, you just have to read through the first chapter or so. So please check it outtttttt :

It's Always Been You

Chapter 4: Saturday

The next morning Kansas woke up to find herself in a bed that was definitely not hers, and resting her head on someone's chest she glanced up and was somewhat surprised to see Sirius's familiar face, and then the memories of last night came rushing back to her, the way he held her when she started to cry, and the way he genuinely seemed to care. He was probably the only one who even cared in the slightest. Sighing she realized that she would probably have to go back to classes today. How was she supposed to face all of those people? She knew that Lily told everyone, and she knew that everyone would be offering their sympathy, and that was the last thing she wanted. God this was going to be a long day she started to sit up a little, trying to be careful not to wake Sirius, but when she got half way up, she realized that his arms were wrapped around her, and he was still holding her close to him. She laid back down again and tried to rest until he woke up, but the thoughts of how all of the other students would treat her was bothering her to no end. Looking at the clock on Sirius's little bedside table she decided that she had to wake him up, if they didn't hurry they would be late for classes. She gently nudged him, and called his name softly until he opened his eyes;

"What…?" he mumbled as he looked at her, "Are you okay, do you need something? Oh sorry…" he finished as he realized how tight he was holding her.

"No, I am fine thanks, but if we are going to make it to classes on time we need to get going."

"Sweetie……" he moaned as he rolled over on to his stomach, "It is Saturday, there are no classes."

"Oops, I am soooo sorry, I forgot." Kansas stammered as she turned a dark shade of pink.

"It is fine, you have a lot on your mind. Here lets go back to sleep for a little while, you could use some more." He said as he buried his face into the pillow and got comfortable

"Okay, that sounds good to me." She said as she settled back down next to him.

"I have to say sweets, I am surprised that you are staying with me…..I thought you would have jumped at the opportunity to go sleep in your own bed." Sirius said with a smirk as he lifted his arm us so she could curl up next to him.

"Well….ummmmmm..do you want me to go to my own room?"

"No. I don't mind you being here. I just thought that you would want to be alone, or something. But please stay here." After this, both Kansas and Sirius stayed quiet, trying to go back to sleep. Kansas knew that she would never fall asleep again, but she thought maybe she should try. About 5 minutes later Sirius said "Sleeping not working?"

"No, I just can't go back to sleep. There is too much going on in my head right now."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No….." Kansas said quietly refusing to meet his eyes. He gently lifted her chin up and said, "If you ever, and I mean ever need someone to talk to, you know who to come to. Right?"

"Yeah, of course. Lily." Kansas said with a smirk waiting to see his reaction. Giving her a shocked look he joked, "Okay, if you want it to be all about her and all over school."

"Too true….I guess I will have to talk to someone else…no idea who though….."

"Verryyyyy funny sweetie." Sirius growled at her as he started to tickle her.

"Sirius…stop..please…" she managed to say in between the gasps of laughter. He finally stopped and waited for her to regain her composure. After a few minutes she looked at him and said, "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Being here, and caring, and well everything. Especially last night."

"No problem. What do you want to do today?"

"Well….I was thinking……."

"KANSAS….where are you?" looking at Sirius, Kansas groaned, that was definitely Lily's voice, "KANSAS, I need you!"

"Oh god, I better go." Kansas muttered as she crawled over Sirius to get out of bed. She was halfway over him when he grabbed her waist and asked, "Kan, how are we going to explain why you were up here?"

"Oh no….I didn't think about that." Kansas started to say when Lily burst into the room.

"KANSAS, come on, I want to go shopping." Lily demanded at her, and then spun on her heel and walked out of the room. Rolling her eyes and climbing off of Sirius, Kansas whispered, "I guess there are some good things about 'friends' being so self centered."

"Yeah I guess there is, she didn't even notice."

"Yeah…well I better go, bye." Kansas said as she started to walk away from him, when she got to the door of the dormitory, she looked back over her shoulder, and gave Sirius one last smile as she left.

Kansas literally spent the whole day doing the one thing she hated most in the world, shopping. She found it to be completely boring and a waste of time, and the fact that she was with Lily wasn't helping matters any. Ever since they had left, Kansas had been miserable. She couldn't get everything out of her head, and she was tired of having to try and ignore all of the pain. They finally got back to Hogwarts at 9:30 at night, and Kansas was a little disappointed to only see James in the common room waiting for Lily, she had kind of been hoping Sirius would be there so that she could thank him again. Deciding that she didn't want to stay down stairs and listen to Lily and James, she went up to the girls dormitory and tried to go to sleep. She laid there for about 2 hours, never falling asleep, and crying. She didn't want to be alone, she needed someone around her, someone who cared. She quietly slipped downstairs into the common room and sat in front of the fire for a little while, before she decided what she had to do……………

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